Thursday, April 19, 2007

Just Too Hard

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I've found it too hard to do much of anything lately, especially blog. And while I can think of many subjects to blog about, I just can't bring myself to write one.

I could tell you about my hike or seeing 13 peacocks the other day. I could write about my heirloom tomato garden and all my favorite varieties. Maybe post some pictures that I took to describe my little valley as viewed from the creek or regale you with another tale of my insane dog and her silly antics. I could blog about how I'm finally trying to face my fears of hooking up a lampwork torch in my shop after 6 years of classes. Or I could cop out and post that story of my childhood friend, Buster the bull, that I promised to Velvet what feels like a lifetime ago.

But the truth is, it all feels so petty. Because I'm not a father waiting to get my son's body so I can bury him. I'm not a student that had many friends die. I'm not a suddenly overworked mortician. I'm not recovering from surgery to three different bullet wounds. I'm not a mother grappling with the thought that I raised a madman. No, nothing in my world feels as important as all that.

So, on a positive note --- the one thing I've learned in all of this craziness this week is that a belt can be used as a door stop by folding it in half and jamming it under the door. That way, you don't stay in front of the door to protect yourself and others. I'm going to make sure my godson knows this... How sad we even have to have this conversation.

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

yes, Monday was a sad day for the world. how does a person reach the point of going totally mad and killing 32 people before taking their own life. I saw on the news about the gunman listening to a collective soul song over and over and the words I remember are teach me how to love; teach me how to share..... I don't know the rest of the words...but this struck me as so sad....
how have we gotten to this point of so many school shootings and threats...maybe just maybe we all need to live our own lives with a little more compassion and teach our children compassion. compassion for the different, compassion for those that have less. maybe this country needs to be reminded that we were founded as one nation under God... and we need to start living as such...

Velvet Sacks said...

Holly, you're such a good writer that I'd have been pleased to read about any of the topics you listed in your first paragraph--but I doubt you could have written much that would have moved me more than this post did.

So sad--and so senseless.

CreekHiker said...

Velvet, yes, so very sad.

And thank you so much for the compliment... it means a lot coming from one of my favorite writers!

Jackie said...

Holly, you have written a very moving post. My heart still aches over this tragedy. I cannot even imagine being one of those you mentioned in your next to last paragraph.

Jackie said...

Holly, I know what you mean about everything seeming so petty. It's humbling when we realize that our 'big' problems, weighed against something like this - really are NOT so big at all.

Annie said...

You are grieving, Creekwalker, and when one grieves everything comes to a halt for memorial.