Two Ditzy Women Facing Future

My best friend and I frequently talk about what we hope our lives will be like when we finally leave oh-so-expensive California. We have no idea where we will land. It just won't be here. Or Oregon. We've ruled out Oregon.

Recently, we realized we have different ideas and expectations about neighbors. It went like this:

Her: Yeah, I want some space. My closest neighbor should be about a quarter mile away.
Me: A quarter mile? That's like...from here to the corner. No! That's way too close! I want my closest neighbor a mile away.
Her: But, you want them somewhat close - in case of emergencies.
Me: A mile is plenty close. A few minutes by car or twenty on foot.
Her: (frustrated) You do know that YOU would be my closest neighbor?
Me: Uh huh and YOU know that YOU would be MY closest neighbor?
Her: And you still want me a mile away?
Me: Uh...yeah! You blast that Karaoke machine when you have parties!
Her: You're always at my parties.
Me: Oh.

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