Velvet's post about wearing her pants backwards across three states had me rolling in laughter! I'm rather well known for putting my clothes on inside out. Hey, my bedroom is really dark and the light is on a remote and it's not that bright when it's on. Whatever... but I did wear a dress backwards one night ...and was mortified.
It was a chilly fall night when a good friend phoned. She was upset. She needed to see me right away. In spite of the distance between our houses, she made record time. She had caught her husband of a decade cheating and was very distraught. She asked for a cocktail. I'm not a heavy drinker but being a good Southerner, I always have some good bourbon in the house.
She sat on my patio, drinking smooth bourbon, chain smoking, petting my dog, hashing and rehashing all the signs she coulda woulda seen. Suddenly the alcohol was going to her head. She needed food. I offered to whip something up. No... she wanted to be around people.
I needed to change out of my dog walking sweats. Sensing a long evening ahead, I chose something fashionably comfortable. I tossed on a black slip and, over that, I added a sheer purple floral dress I had bought at a studio sale. We were off to the closest restaurant - California Pizza Kitchen.
The place was packed. I got up to get some more sweetener for my tea and went to put the packets in my pocket... I could've sworn that dress had pockets. (It's always the pockets, eh Velvet??)
We ate. My friend drank and continued the hashing and rehashing as I comforted her as best I could. It was late and time to go.... back to my porch.
My patio chair seemed uncomfortable. What WAS that digging into my butt?? A button? This dress only has buttons on...the...pockets. OMG!
The countless trips I made parading around that crowded restaurant flashed through my mind: three to the bathroom, twice to the bar, sweetener for the tea, to say hello to a neighbor. Were people staring??? It sure felt like it. At the time, I chalked it up to the fact that I was one of the few people who didn't have on a costume.In retrospect, I'm so relieved it happened on Halloween.